I’ve been recently experiencing a compliment conundrum that’s been bugging me: A few of my friends and peers have been telling me that it looks like I’ve been losing weight.
The funny part about this is that I haven’t been losing weight at all. My clothing size has not changed in months and the weight my doctor took at a recent appointment wasn’t any different than the year before.
While I don’t think the weight loss comments directed to me had true malintent, I do think there is a bigger societal issue that’s coming into play. We live in a world where a lot of our worth is placed on physical attributes and I honestly hate it.
Plus-size bodies like mine are seen as problematic, and thus it is unfortunately understood that telling a plus-size person that they look like they’re losing weight is a positive thing while it can be damaging in actuality. Weight and body size should solely be a discussion between you and your healthcare provider.
This also goes beyond body size. Anyone else’s opinion in regards to your body, any part of it, is generally unnecessary and unwarranted. You do not know what someone’s relationship is with their body, so I believe it’s best to avoid giving physical compliments in general.
I believe character-based compliments carry more power than physical-based compliments. You’re more likely to take something positive away from someone saying you’re a good person than when they mention your toned legs. Don’t judge a book by it’s cover, right? It’s our souls and personalities that should be getting praised!
The next time you’re looking to compliment your friends, family members, or peers, try highlighting their personal characteristics instead of their appearance. Here’s a little of thirty character-based compliments that could make someone’s day:
- I admire you.
- You’re incredibly gifted at ____________.
- You never fail to make me laugh.
- You empower everyone around you.
- I am my best self when I’m around you.
- Your joy is contagious.
- You light up a room.
- There is no one else like you. You’re one of a kind!
- You make the world a better place.
- You’re dependable and reliable.
- You’re genuine and down-to-earth.
- I trust you.
- Your hard work deserves recognition.
- You’re a total badass.
- I wish I could handle life as well as you do. You’re super capable.
- Your passion is palpable.
- You’re an amazing listener.
- I can talk to you about anything.
- You’re an awesome leader and team member.
- I’m lucky to know you.
- You have excellent taste in ____________.
- You’re inspiring.
- You’re wonderful just the way you are.
- Thank goodness you exist!
- You make me want to be a better person.
- I’m always in a good mood after spending time with you.
- You are intelligent and creative.
- You have a big heart.
- You matter. Your ideas, beliefs, and feelings matter.
- I’m grateful to have you in my life.